(no subject)

[grace_and_june]

I've been busy trying to make changes to my diet and eating habits (partly to lose some weight). One of the things I've been dabbling in is in thinking about calorie density, satiety, and shifting towards having a more pescetarian diet. It was mind blowing to see various websites put different foods with different caloric densities next to each other, with amounts shown for the same amount of calories per different foods. I feel empowered understanding the actual trade-off I'm making when I eat snacks instead of throwing veggies into the microwave for a proper meal/mini meal. I'd be thinking, "I could be eating more for the same number of calories!" and then would proceed to have at least some fruit or tea instead or something. 

I'm also playing around with recipes involving legumes and vegetables (specifically middle-eastern food and salads). Recent wins are buying tahini, making hummus from scratch (! delicious), and pairing this hummus with a simple slice of toast and some veggies for a power-packed, satisfying meal. Sesame is one of my most favourite foods and with tahini I get great flavour in everything I put it into; I got to make a sesame-dressed hiyashi chuka ramen the other day and it was great!! Might try putting some in eggs for an omelette and see how that goes. 

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I've been consuming a little bit of non-fictional media regarding food and the cultural shifts in time that inform the way food is made and produced. This has been an interesting exercise in learning how to consume non-fiction and the benefits that come from that. One nice thing about reading and consuming non-fiction, I've found, is that you are absolutely not required to finish everything in a sequential manner. Most times you are able to skip chapters, skim them, and, in the case of videos, play them at 2x speed to save you time (especially if subtitles are included and you can speed-read). I completed the Great Courses series on Cooking Through the Ages this way, and am on my way to completing a book on food culture in my home country. 

(Just a side thought: just how great is it when non-fiction is written like a conversation with the reader?? Add to that an enthusiasm and interest in the phenomena being studied and you get great non-fiction. Possibly one of the most underrated joys of reading you can find today.) 

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For quite a few years now I've been aware that I'm on some kind of predestination track for the moment while everything in my life is being renovated and changed (lots of deja vu and dream-based prescience). Most of the time this is paired with some kind of woo-level IRL accompaniment by a spirit(s?) of some kind--the identity of this spirit changes and is fluid, but given the work I've been doing with them as the black sheep of my family they're probably aligned towards the trickster-type deity you'll find Enki and Loki being examples of (I've probably been mis-identifying them for a few years now, which I will put down as my aversion to the idea being manipulated and being scared in general of the type). I've had my time with formalised devotional practice and random-ass roadside mediumship work and most of the time this guy just wants to chill and sit around while I enjoy my holidays? I appreciate that they're not messing around with my schizophrenia. I also appreciate that they aren't horsing me (like at all). They give me the space I need to complete my degree. Overall I look forward to the day where I get my personal mental space back but I also appreciate not being dumped out in the cold while things happen around me. 

So anyway, about being on some kind of predestination arrangement: I recently found out that I have a family member who has a history of asking for benefits from a specific deity and their medium without sufficient paying-back. From what I can tell I might be on this predestination track because I could be dancing the very tricky dance of balancing making payment to the deity in a way that allows me to go on living my own life. I believe that this all adds up in the wider scheme of things--my mother and I believe that without help I'd probably have ended up being forced into becoming a medium at some temple somewhere, depending on how arrangements with the deity end up being. We have a good arrangement in terms of spiritual practice and having a temple to call home while all this gets sorted out.

(Sigh--what was that family member thinking??? Typical magical thinking tinged with greed. )-: At least things are on their way to being resolved!) 

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School-wise, I'll not be taking Korean for my last semester of my degree--I think I'll get a much better learning experience (and more fun) with the language in a non-assessed mode of education, at my own pace. I'm almost all done learning Hangeul already! 

Comments

[adore]

Ditto on Korean language learning experience. I'm self-learning too! I find that I'm more motivated when I think of it as a hobby, as something I do when I want to. I can read Hangeul but need practice writing it.

What kinds of magical thinking have you come across, and what's your own? I think the biggest thing I grapple with on my own spiritual path is working out how I think magic works, for myself. Haven't figured it out yet but the different philosophical takes on it fascinate me, even the ones I'm not fond of (cough law of attraction cough).

I haven't connected with trickster deity but I HAVE connected with fae or faeries, and I relate to your apprehensions about being possibly manipulated. I think that fear comes with the territory and I don't really have any useful input there, except that for myself, I kind of allowed my ideas about our connection to develop with my interactions rather than step back from or analyse them. So it's more experiential, like you're doing.

[grace_and_june]

Woohoo! Korean self-learners unite! After Hangeul I'll be wrestling with how to do input via computer and on the phone (-: Have you started on grammar yet? I'm still at the stage of trying to read the on-screen captions and notes for variety shows ahah.

As for magic: personally, I make a distinction between magic and magical thinking--magic for me comes in the form of novel and revealing mechanisms dealing with the spiritual and material worlds (so science is a form of magic and vice versa, people in bodied and non-bodied forms coming togther to get something done is another form of magic); whereas I'd say that magical thinking (the way I use the term) is a negative thing that comes from being handwavy with the mechanics of how things happen and takes that for granted (like when someone goes to a temple and then prays for things without thinking about how these things are achieved). I'd say that, for me, appreciating magic involves being respectful of how things come to be and come to pass--looking at the odds of human life and things working out and thinking:"Isn't it amazing how life works? How often people are good to each other? How often things turn out well despite the odds?" So not really magic as a concrete thing, but more of a way of seeing the world haha.

Fae! I haven't had any interactions with faeries at all--most of my interactions are with human-shaped beings in general. What's it like to work with them? When it comes to the spiritual I always think it's wise to know yourself as well as you can and stick to your principles (or at least learn these in the process of working with the spiritual)--it sounds like you're going into things without bringing in preconceptions of how your interactions are going to work out, which sounds like a good thing to me (-:

[adore]

Input is the hardest for me >.< I've sort of started grammar with Talk To Me in Korean and KoreanClass101 because I'm trying to learn it alongside vocab, not one to the neglect of another... but it's rather disorganised right now haha. I'm only using resources to the extent that they're free, and I think that's plenty.

I still struggle to read on-screen captions because of the fancy fonts + sometimes the subtitle translates what's being said but not the on-screen caption.
Someday I'll read webtoons in Korean. We'll get there!

This is mind-blowing because it's the first time I've come across a magical worldview so close to my own. I mean, I've met witches who don't cast as a matter of principle, and witches to do, but most of my magical experience has been divinatory. Like, seeing patterns in my life, divining the future, and through that process becoming respectful of how things come to be and come to pass like you said! And I do think I'm talking to divine beings within and through tarot decks.

On the other hand, I'm not entirely sure about making things happen, and I'm very much still figuring out how I'd like to cast spells, if I do. I know spellcasting is empowering for some and I'm still in the process of finding out whether it is for me. But at first, it just felt so... mundane trying to make things happen? Like it wasn't this zingy experience of connection and amazement I had with cartomancy.

So then I tried spellcasting with my tarot and oracle cards, and it was completely different from the magical theories I've read: about magic following the path of least resistance, for example. In my case magic happened with a great push, like making me push a mountain off my own chest. There was a LOT of resistance which was cleared in one go. And I haven't gotten what I want immediately because I'm getting what I asked for, but in the way that's best for me. I had something in my mind when I cast the spell and I've been shown by the cards and the divine that it's not right for me, and there's something better... sorry for getting vague and rambly over here but it was like my magical experience didn't really echo anyone else's, and they all seemed to agree on certain things when it came to spellcasting–which my experience didn't align with at all.

I do dabble with crystals but, like spellcasting, I only work with them when I really need to. So I don't have a lot of anecdotal data to draw conclusions from.

Faeries are wonderful for creative work. They're drawn to the energy of art. I don't have a whole lot of nature around me, but I do have my writing, and certain moments of writing fiction hold fae energy for me. (I'm thinking of getting Brian Froud's Faeries Oracle, or maybe some other fae-themed decks, but I don't know. I certainly think the manipulation/trickster-y apprehensions would be more pronounced with me if I tried to work with them divinatorily for advice, insight, or fortunetelling. I'll see.)

[grace_and_june]

Free resources are great!! I'm going super slow with my pace of learning right now, mostly just picking up people's names from the captions (to practice spelling) and getting used to the formality system/formality grammar. My goal is to read recipes and read what's on the label of ingredients. :D I have this fear of webtoons because the first one I ever tried was this one horror one and when you scrolled to a certain point it would scroll down for you without your input and the scary monsterbeing looked like it was getting closer to the reader. Very creative, but also stopped me from exploring further, the scaredy cat that I am--haha!

Divinatory practice is a great way to get involved, for sure! It's a great way to test the waters while getting to know the specific type of woo that you have going with you and around you, I think. There's also the way in which knowledge and understanding empowers and enriches in a way that active trial-and-error cannot provide, and I think it's just neat overall. From my experience, it takes quite a lot for cartomancy to work from a woo perspective--if it's working for you that's really special and I hope it brings you clarity and truth in your practice both with yourself and with the powers that be. (-: I haven't touched my cards in forever, but I like how cards involve art and meaning and a sense of perspective. It's got a conceptual range that, I feel, helps bring a wider perspective to a problem or issue, and can act as a sound-board even when woo is not involved. :D

Personally I try not to cast spells because most of the time I find that I have /too much/ happening in my life and standing back helps me see through the chaos (which gives me the opportunity to think my way through things). I like to work more on having a healthy internal space, cultivating healthy mental habits, and to work with things as opposed to dictating how things go--I assert myself using my human skill of negotiation, being abiding, and empathising, rather than on energy manipulation. On that note, though, it didn't hurt to have learnt how to do some basic energy cleansing and bodily purification (and anxiety management lol). What /really/ helped me was finding a temple that has some kind of spiritual functionality and capacity to help in times of crisis when something really bad is going down.

What you've written about fae and fae energy is really interesting! I'm now going through my mental experience file and squinting at things a bit differently now.

[adore]

My goal is to read recipes and read what's on the label of ingredients. :D
Ohh that's lovely! I haven't tried cooking anything Korean because I won't find the ingredients here, but whatever I've seen of it looks scrumptious. Especially hotpots.

I like how cards involve art and meaning and a sense of perspective. It's got a conceptual range that, I feel, helps bring a wider perspective to a problem or issue, and can act as a sound-board even when woo is not involved. :D
Yep! Tarot is versatile enough that people use it for self-reflection and so on, people who don't do spirituality are similar in their approach to the tarot and they find it a useful tool just as much as we woo. XD I love art and storytelling/meaning-making so I took to the tarot like a hummingbird to nectar.

Personally I try not to cast spells because most of the time I find that I have /too much/ happening in my life and standing back helps me see through the chaos (which gives me the opportunity to think my way through things).
That makes a lot of sense. So far I have mostly cast spells for big-picture things, so it's less 'making something happen' and more 'marking where I want to go' and how I get there is still a nebulous, figuring it out as I live, kind of thing.

On that note, though, it didn't hurt to have learnt how to do some basic energy cleansing and bodily purification (and anxiety management lol).
I love energy work and mine is similar, breathwork and yoga and that kind of thing. To help with general wellbeing rather than specific outcomes, like you said.

What /really/ helped me was finding a temple that has some kind of spiritual functionality and capacity to help in times of crisis when something really bad is going down.
Wow. I'd love to know more about this if you'd be willing to expand upon it! Going by this alone, I've tried to find bits of nature when I could, since it's a balm to my soul, but it's not easy when you're in a city.

What you've written about fae and fae energy is really interesting! I'm now going through my mental experience file and squinting at things a bit differently now.
Fun. XD I like how paradigm-shifting spirituality can be even in the little ways/re: the little things.